Darling, hate is a strong word but so is love.

I'm fit to burst with happiness, for absolutely no reason at all. I like these moods the best, it's like an emotional surprise gift from yourself. Maybe I finally realized that I am on my road to freedom, and to being the person I want to be and my heart is singing. The Beatles really make a good soundtrack for me lately. I have a sudden new respect for them and understanding of their lyrics. I think I'm going to find some literature by some of their members. 

Lord. I don't remember being this happy in ages. I've been feeling like a glowering old persian cat lately, this is a nice change. There's no damper on me anymore, and I can say I honestly don't care about a particular someone anymore. (attempt at Buddhist right speech) I have been in high debate whether or not speaking ill of someone really has any cathartic effect on one at all, or can be at all positive. If used to disassociate said person from good graces, and if said in confidence then I think it could be alright, just so long as you don't cling to the hatred. 

On another note, I have found that I enjoy people most when they have a distinctive and strong character about them. Something that is uniquely theirs and is unforgettable, not to mention (generally) unexplainable. I would adore to find a boy with such a quality. It's always so striking and disgustingly attractive. For now, I would very much like someone to work on my spirituality with. Buddhist monk for a second best friend? I'm game. 

- Maria Van Gogh.

ps.

"Of all the love I have won or have lost
there is one love I should never have crossed
She was a girl in a million, my friend
I should have known she would win in the end!"